Interstitial Cystitis Advice

Christmas like its turkey consuming counter-part, Thanksgiving, is a wonderful time to reflect upon one’s life and all it contains in this moment. Wrought by serious and severe medical problems it often becomes more difficult to look for positive-ness amongst the muck of agony. Believe me I understand, and I’m not looking at this from a “vomit inducing” overly optimistic standpoint, but rather one laden with reality and realistic hope. If the holidays don’t mean Christmas for you this message still applies, regardless of what your faith or way or celebrating the holiday season is.

A strange thing has been occurring to me lately, I am finding that when I’m experiencing a bout of pain, be it IC or otherwise, I am stronger mentally to handle it. Perhaps this comes form dealing with chronic pain for years now, in part yes, this is likely the case. I have come to realize that increased (by increased I mean higher then my “normal” daily level) pain typically doesn’t last forever. This doesn’t decrease the pain while you are experiencing it at all, but it is like a tiny light at the end of a treacherous, dark tunnel. I’ve used the analogy when dealing with a flare of pain, “If there’s a tarantula/snake/any terrifying creature crawling on me today and you tell me it’ll be okay, it’ll be gone tomorrow”, I’m suffering no less today. By this I mean that in the moment something is real and perhaps very frightening or worrisome, it is one hundred percent real and it takes president in your life, regardless of how you will feel tomorrow or next week or whenever. When pain is intense the whole world seems to exist only in the moment.

This being said, I am more grateful than ever for good days/hours/minutes when I am not in a flare of one sort or another. Greater though than the adaptation of my body to cope with continual pain/”disease” (I put that in quotes because I loath the word disease, preferring the slightly more cheerful word “conditions”) which is mildly disturbing in and of itself –I think that my ability to deal with pain management better comes from the blessings I have received in my life. Primarily from my husband’s (we were married this year) unwavering love and beautiful tenderness, for the support and encouragement he gives me every day. For never making me feel like anything less than a princess, for holding me when I can’t stop the tears. For letting me squeeze his hand so hard, it’s amazing I don’t break it. For being my pillar of strength and my greatest joy.

There have been other things this year to be thankful for as well; wonderful doctors, medications that are helping a bit. But aside from those things I am thankful for everything I have in my life that is good, for whatever fortunes I do posses. I am grateful to have peace in my country; I wish the entire world could say the same. I am thankful for the love and unending support of my mother, my mommy-she is a strongest and most remarkable woman I have ever had the privilege of knowing, her understanding this year has gotten me through some extremely rough and stressful times. I am thankful to all the family members and loved ones who have shown me love and support and understanding. No act of kindness no matter how tiny went unnoticed, I assure you.

I am thankful that research is being carried out every day on IC. Thankful that I live in an age where there are at least some treatment options available for IC. I am thankful for what I do have left of my health, and as always for not being afflicted with any condition that is fatal.

Every day we are blessed, and I don’t mean that in a religious connotation, but rather one of fortune and privilege, in more ways than we will ever even realize. That’s all right, it’s these behind the scenes blessing which help the current of life flow smoothly, even when you’re going through rapids.

Imagine for a moment that you are lying in bed, the date is December 24th and you have just turned off the light and slipped under the covers. Drifting into slumber you are awakened by a voice calling your name in a wailing moan (okay you caught me, perhaps this is cliché but I couldn’t resist the urge).

There before you stands the ghost of Christmas past, now whether or not you’ve been “humbugging” this year is of little relevance. The spirit glides to your side and takes you from your bed (and your wonderfully cosy heating pad) and leads you into the past. What would he (or she, nothing says in the twenty first century that it has to be a he!) show you? Surely everyone has had times in their lives that were similar in some fashion to those of Ebenezer. Would your ghost wear the chains of your life too?

Returning to your bed world you believe what you had just experienced or chalk it up to eggnog that was dangerously close to it’s expiry date? If the second ghost appeared, the apparition of Christmas present would it show you the world through your eyes or their own? Perhaps the ghost of Christmas present should come to all of us and show us that there are others less fortunate than ourselves. But life is not a competition of sufferings and misfortunes; it is a celebration no matter what your shortcomings or situations are.

Lastly as the eerie ghost of Christmas future crept into your bedroom (somehow bypassing your large dog and your alarm system) and waited for you to return from the bathroom, what scenarios of the days yet to come would this phantom bestow upon your eyes. I am not implying that you would be shown, like Scrooge your own death (in the form of a tombstone), but rather something which perhaps could be avoided or altered if you adapted your life now, or maybe, just maybe the original tale would be re-edited and the last spirit would show you goodness yet to come.

The point of this rendition is simple, we all live the same in terms of how life progresses, we all have moments in our past which were good and bad. Would the spirit of Christmas past show you a time before you were “sick”, before IC? Or would he (or she) show you Christmases with IC that were rougher than your life is now? Likewise we all have a present which we are responsible for. How we feel today inevitably weighs upon the outcome of tomorrow.

The mysterious future; for those with IC (and any other serious medical condition of any kind) the future can be a very scary place or it can be one of hope, ultimately no matter what the spirit showed you the outcome of the future would rest in your hands. If you have been bah-humbugging this year, or this holiday season take a moment, right now (it’s okay if you have to leave and come back to the computer to do this, it works better if you are focused and have your eyes closed) and think of three things you're thankful for, right now in your life. If you’re drawing a blank, I’ll help you out. Be thankful you are alive, this might sound ridiculous but you never know when your number will be up. Be grateful that you are wiser than you were a year ago, simply by living the lessons and adventures each day presents us. Be thankful for the people close to you that you care about and those who give you a shoulder to cry on and an open ear, even if it’s just the members of your support group/forum board online.

Likely everyone will list 3 different things, even if they sound alike, because no two of us live exactly the same life. The holidays have become such a dizzying three ring circus of consumerism and social obligation, why not pause a second and think about it’s core root meanings. Ideas like giving not receiving, helping those less fortunate, and letting the important people in your life know how much they matter to you. Christmas is not defined by how big your tree is, how much electricity you are pumping though those flashing, chaser lights strung across your roof. Christmas is not better because you went into debt or are so stressed out you can’t tell a candy cane from an icicle.

In the days of yore children (and yes, hard as it is to believe we were all children once) understood Christmas, their innocence should be our inspiration today. Put down the metallic ribbon and scotch tape, and really reflect upon what the holidays mean to you and why these factors matter. Seriously whether or not there is a single package under the ol’pine with your name on it, you already have more gifts in your life than you my ever realize. To those who are quick to point out the poor and downtrodden, thank-you, seriously it’s wonderful to think of those in need, now go do whatever you are capable of doing to help those not as blessed as yourself.

This year a fourth sprit will join the entourage, the ghost of Christmas happiness. This spirit will come to you every year and show you things in the past 12 months that made your life positive, no matter how inconsequential they may have seemed.

To retrace our steps, please understand that even when life seems or is miserable for you, there is no harm in having hope. Is it not better to be positive than negative? I don’t say this simply because I had the best year (not counting my health) of my life. I say this because I have lived some god-awful years of strife and hardship, pain and suffering and I can tell you from the furthest depth of my soul that the more you become cynical and negative the harder it becomes to find hope again. If no one is the world has told you this year, let me be the first. You are worthy of having hope, and you are not fighting this battle (of IC) by yourself.

I wish you the best holiday season that you possibly can have! Make tons of special memories and carry the philosophies of Christmas (or any other celebration you observe) with you beyond the moment when the ball drops one New Year’s Eve. In the classic Christmas movie "White Christmas", Bing Crosby sang the line “When I'm worried and I can't sleep I count my blessings instead of sheep, and I fall asleep counting my blessings…When my bankroll is getting small I think of when I had none at all, and I fall asleep counting my blessings” I remember the first time I heard this as a little girl, because its message has resonated through out my life, and I urge you to look at life in much the same light. Be it the candle flame of a menorah, twinkling coloured bulbs or a star in the sky, take these symbols of light and let them shine a path for hope in your life.

With care and understanding, cheer and goodwill, Happy Holidays to all!